Don't ask daddy to dress the moppet... with extra whining for your enjoyment!
OK, so this morning daddy is trying to be helpful. The curvaceous goddess is in the shower, and I'm guarding the moppet, waiting for her brain to ooze out her ears as she watches a video for the 2,543rd time. So I decide to get the little one dressed -- it hasn't gone well in the past, but this time will be different!
We march into her room and dunderhead daddy looks, deer-in-headlights style, at the contents of her closet. To the right I spy a matched outfit! A cute little overalls-and-frilly-shirt combo. Ye gods! How could daddy go wrong? So I slip the shirt over her head and then start on the overalls. It's a bit of a tight squeeze, and they're a little short, but hey, it's very much Spring here in Georgia, right?
The goddess emerges from the shower, and I proudly display the moppet, and daddy's handiwork. But the satisfied grin quickly fades from my face as my lovely wife takes one look and dies laughing. Yes folks, the overalls are way too small... laughably so. (Suddenly I can now see this.) So... no problem, daddy can fix this. I march back to the closet and pull out another, larger pair of overalls. (The shirt fits fine. Here's to small miracles.)
I put the other pair of overalls on the moppet, and then the goddess emerges from her dressing chambers to take a gander. I head back to get ready for my day, and then emerge to find, strangely, that the moppet is wearing yet ANOTHER pair of overalls. Yes, I had picked another pair past the sell-by date for my growing child.
As I shook my head and walked away, I could hear my lovely wife telling the moppet: "Daddy's trying not to have to dress you anymore."
Honey, believe me when I say this... I'm NOT "trying." Really!
* * *
OK, I'm obviously having issues fitting blogging into my new life, with frenetically fun, but all-consuming new job. Since I'm a writer/editor anyway, I'm going to try to blog to warm up for the day. This will probably limit the number of painstakingly researched, massively linked posts, but I'll try to make the personal rants entertaining. Deal??
We march into her room and dunderhead daddy looks, deer-in-headlights style, at the contents of her closet. To the right I spy a matched outfit! A cute little overalls-and-frilly-shirt combo. Ye gods! How could daddy go wrong? So I slip the shirt over her head and then start on the overalls. It's a bit of a tight squeeze, and they're a little short, but hey, it's very much Spring here in Georgia, right?
The goddess emerges from the shower, and I proudly display the moppet, and daddy's handiwork. But the satisfied grin quickly fades from my face as my lovely wife takes one look and dies laughing. Yes folks, the overalls are way too small... laughably so. (Suddenly I can now see this.) So... no problem, daddy can fix this. I march back to the closet and pull out another, larger pair of overalls. (The shirt fits fine. Here's to small miracles.)
I put the other pair of overalls on the moppet, and then the goddess emerges from her dressing chambers to take a gander. I head back to get ready for my day, and then emerge to find, strangely, that the moppet is wearing yet ANOTHER pair of overalls. Yes, I had picked another pair past the sell-by date for my growing child.
As I shook my head and walked away, I could hear my lovely wife telling the moppet: "Daddy's trying not to have to dress you anymore."
Honey, believe me when I say this... I'm NOT "trying." Really!
* * *
OK, I'm obviously having issues fitting blogging into my new life, with frenetically fun, but all-consuming new job. Since I'm a writer/editor anyway, I'm going to try to blog to warm up for the day. This will probably limit the number of painstakingly researched, massively linked posts, but I'll try to make the personal rants entertaining. Deal??
posted by Godric of Finchale | 9:06 AM
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